Responding to a disclosure in a child-centred way

This page summarises some key principles about responding to a child or young person who discloses an experience of harm or abuse. This page reflects the expertise of young people with lived experience of sexual abuse or violence who are members of the Laurel House Expert Advisory Panel for Youth (LEAPY).

Key things to know about responding to a child or young person who discloses abuse:

Research tells us that victim survivors benefit most when responses are trauma-informed, compassionate, comprehensive and focused on healing and restoration.
A child or young person might raise a concern about reportable conduct while the abuse is still happening, right after it occurred, or even weeks, months or years later.
Organisations should react with care and consideration, and in a way that protects the interests of the child

The below table summarises some key principles and what they look like in practice when responding to a child or young person who has disclosed harm.

Principle	Description	What this looks like
Providing support	Children and young people who have been harmed need utmost support and care. They also need to be assisted to access other supports, such as counselling services and trusted adults who are removed from the investigation process.	Reassuring the child or young person that they are doing the right thing by speaking up, they are believed and they are taken seriously. Tell them that what happened to them is not their fault. Supporting the child or young person to identify and maintain connection with a trusted adult who is not part of the reportable conduct process, and who can provide safe and consistent support while the reportable conduct investigation is underway (e.g. a counsellor). Maintaining a calm, composed, and gentle manner that creates a sense of safety for the child or young person. Connecting the child or young person with support services they would like to know more about.
Being prepared	We all need to be prepared to support a child or young person who has been harmed. Small steps, taken in advance, can make a big difference if a child or young person discloses harm.	Having spare pens and paper available in case a child or young person needs to write down or draw an experience of harm. Having fidget toys on hand. Having a list of local support services to refer a child or young person to, if they need or want it.
Consistently offering choice	Children and young people who have been harmed need to have a say in how they participate in a reportable conduct investigation, and other processes that may connect to it.	Asking the child or young person what they need so they can feel safe and involved in the process. Offering the child or young person the option of moving to a different location when speaking about their experience and acknowledging that this may be different for different people. For example, one child or young person may prefer to speak outside, as opposed to a formal office environment, whereas another may prefer the privacy of an enclosed space. This may also look like asking the child or young person “would you like the door open or closed?” Ensuring the child or young person has the opportunity to add, change, or otherwise revise their evidence after their initial disclosure. Working towards mutually suitable compromise when you have a legal duty to fulfil that conflicts with what the child or young person wants.
Taking decisive action	Leaders of organisations need to take decisive action when there is a child abuse-related concern involving a worker, and ‘get the job done’ of responding in a child-centred way.	Taking immediate action to appropriately document any disclosures made to you by a child or young person, rather than relying on memory alone. Taking immediate action to limit or suspend the worker’s contact with the child or young person, as well as any other children or young people, while their conduct is being investigated. Taking immediate action to notify any other authorities or oversight bodies that need to know about the concern, in line with the organisation’s other, existing reporting obligations.
Showing respect	Showing and practising respect towards a child or young person who has experienced harm can have a huge impact on their safety and wellbeing throughout the reportable conduct investigation process — and beyond.	Paying full and close attention to the child or young person when they are telling you what has happened and actively listening to them. Giving the child or young person the time and space they need to express themselves, and not rushing them. Believing the child or young person, and validating their experience. Thanking the child or young person for trusting you with their experience. Affirming them that they’ve done the right and brave thing by telling you about it.
Being considerate	A child-centred response to reportable conduct is, in many ways, a matter of basic human empathy. By being considerate, you are creating space and a sense of safety for the child or young person.	Appreciating that it can be hard to find the words or other means to describe the experience of being harmed, and being patient as the child or young person as they express themselves. Not taking big pauses or other hesitation as a sign a child or young person is ‘making things up’. Adjusting your body language to avoid unsettling the child or young person. For example, if they are describing being physically harmed, take care to avoid any sudden gestures or movements. Being mindful of how certain postures and environments can impose power over a child or young person. For example, sitting a child or young person in a seat on the opposite side of an office desk may make them feel like they’re being questioned or interrogated.
Clearly communicating	Children and young people at the centre of a reportable conduct investigation should be kept informed of its progress, and not caught off guard by significant developments. When communicating, adults shouldn’t make promises they can’t keep to children and young people involved in a reportable conduct investigation.	Telling the child or young person what steps you are legally required to take as a result of learning about the reportable conduct so things don’t come ‘out of the blue’. Clearly conveying how the child or young person’s information will be shared in the context of the reportable conduct investigation, and with whom. In particular, telling the child or young person what the worker who committed the conduct will be told and not told. Taking time to explain processes and procedures in a gentle, clear, and accessible way. This can make the process less intimidating and return a sense of power and safety. Unless it places the child or young person at risk, communicate with their parents or carers, and do so prior to going to the police. Avoid making assumptions about what the child or young person wants: ask, then support, them. For example, some children or young people would want to tell the police their experience, even if it means repeating their story, because it was important for them to have their word taken down by the authorities. Giving copies of the investigation materials, such as a letter of allegation, to the child or young person and their parents or carers. Being afraid of saying the ‘wrong thing’ can be understandable when a child or young person discloses harm to you, but don’t let this fear stop you from responding in a gentle, kind, and compassionate way.
Be mindful of all children	An instance of reportable conduct against one child or young person will likely have an impact on their peers. Being mindful of this means creating a sense of safety for all children and young people in your organisation.	Considering what support other children or young people in the organisation may need, in addition to the one who has experienced harm. It is possible that there are other children who have experienced reportable conduct but haven’t come forward. Making it very clear to other children or young people who witnessed or noticed harm being done to a peer that they haven’t done anything wrong, if they feel ashamed that they didn’t tell anyone about the abuse. Grooming in particular is a concept which is inherently difficult to understand by children and young people. It is critical that young people understand special attention provided through grooming behaviour is not appropriate and not a friendship. Informing parents and carers of other children before speaking to those children about the issue, or what they may have observed. When speaking to other children and young people, being gentle in your explanations of what is happening and why. Offer supports to other children or young people who may be secondarily affected by the reportable conduct and the investigation.
Creating or seeking out safe and welcoming spaces	Organisational environments can make it easier or harder for children and young people to express concerns. Taking steps to humanise your environment may make a child or young person more comfortable, and therefore more likely to raise issues if need be.	Having photos of family and/or friends on your desk, artwork, or other things that make your area ‘human’ and warm.